Welcome; Start the journey now. The best is yet to come.
***RELATIONSHIPS IN CRISIS; PRIVATE COUPLES WORKSHOPS
***OPENED: DAYS, EVE'S, WEEKENDS & SAME DAY APPT'S:
***RAPID RECOVERY ACCELERATED; APPROX. 3 to 5 WEEKS
***BOOT CAMP FOR LOVERS: CO-LEAD by DR. MITCH PsyD & LISA
***We Offer Several Couples/Marriages/Mediation/Pre-Marital & Discernment (when one or both parties are leaning towards Divorce) Workshops. This will help to Rapidly Accelerate Your Healing, Your Trust in each other, Your Communication Skills, Your Goals & Expectations, Assess your Motivation and your Commitment to Your Healing Process & Finding Your Pathway to the Art of Forgiveness.
In Addition, in our Private Couples Workshops, we will be working with your more Difficult Challenges that you Both Face as a Couple. Dr. Mitch PsyD & Lisa Life Coaches ( 35+ Years of Experience) will Teach, Make you Aware, Identify & Resolve All of your Challenges. We are here for Both of you Now and in our After-Care Program, (for as long as it takes). We are Extremely Sensitive & Committed to Helping you Get Back Your Loving Relationship & Your Loving Family.
****During our Couples Workshops, (Depending on the Severity of your Challenges) we will see Both of you Individually & Together, in order to Completely Understand your Perspectives/Perception of your Challenges and Issues. After our Assessment we will Formulate an Individualized Treatment Plan, so when we all meet for Your Private Workshop, we will have a Plan of Action, in order to Work Through Your Challenges Step by Step. This will Help each of you, Learn the Art of Communication, Sensitivity, Empathy & Compassion.
****This Advanced Program Works Well Especially, for Couples that have Experienced Traditional Couples Counseling and have been Unsuccessful and Greatly Disappointed. Dr. Mitch PsyD and Lisa Relationship Coaches have over 35 Years of Experience, Helping Couples Connect with each other on a Much Deeper Level (Developing a Deeper Love). In our Years of Practice you can Rest Assured that we have Seen, Heard and Dealt with Every Possible Scenario that you can Tell Us. You have our Ear and our Empathy which makes us even more Determined and Motivated to Help you & Give you the Skills to Overcome each and every Problem you Face Now and in the Future.
***MARRIAGE/COUPLES WORKSHOPS VS TRADITIONAL COUPLES COUNSELING***
***Especially, for Couples that have Been through Traditional Counseling & was Greatly Disappointed***
1) Accelerates Your Healing Immediately (Pathway to Forgiveness)
2) Teach & Provide Knowledge about your Relationship
3) Demonstrate & Learn Communication (Couples Rules & Skills)
4) Learn the Art of a Deeper Love (Intimacy, Sensitivity & Compassion)
5) Learning to Set Goals, Realistic Expectations & Boundaries
6) Learn how to Deal with *Self-Esteem *Anger & Control *Co-Dependency *Alcohol/Addictions *Parenting *Sexual & Emotional Intimacy *Infidelity *Honesty & Transparency *Narcissism *Emotional/Physical Abuse *Anxiety & Depression *Stress *Blending Families *Breakdown of Communication
. 7) Having Dr. Mitch PsyD & Lisa Relationship Coaches (35+ Years of Experience) Co-Leading our Workshops, having a Male and Female Perspective.
8) Offers Marriage Mediation (to Help you Neg0tiate your Issues/Challenges).
9) Discernment Workshop (to Assess your Motivation & Commitment to your Relationship: Typically when one or both Parties aren't sure they want to Continue their Relationship).
10) Workshops are More Interactive and Informative rather than being Passive.
****We also Realized that Dwelling in the Past in many Cases "DOES MORE HARM THAN GOOD". Dr. Mitch and Lisa Now Focus Our Individual Clients & Couples Workshops on YOUR PRESENT Life Challenges. Therefore, we can Help YOU IMMEDIATELY, by Giving You the *Tools *Understanding *Knowledge and *Sensitivity, you Need to Resolve Your Relationship Problems/Challenges Successfully. ****However, we are Completely Aware of how our Past Affects us in the Present, but Does Not Define Us****
**HOPE IS STRONGER THAN FEAR**
*With our 35+ Years of Experience, we will Educate and Teach you how to Identify & Work Through your Issues to Resolution. Once Achieved, you will have Learned the Art of Communication & Learn How to Overcome Any & All of Your Communication Challenges in the Future. These Workshops are Informative & Powerful, in order to Accelerate Your Healing Process, Learn to Communicate in a Loving, Sensitive & Caring way & Stop any further Damage from Occurring. After our Couples have Completed Our Relationship Program, their Success Rate for Positive Communication & Sensitivity has increased Substantially.
(See our Marriage Rules & Skills above on our Website)
***Dr. Mitch PsyD & Lisa Relationship Coaches always say, We are the Most Experienced Professional's that are still Working (over 35+ years). You can always Count on our Honesty & be Assured that we are Not Here to Take Sides with either of you. However, we are on Both of Your Sides, in order, to Help you get Back your Loving Relationship.
***IN ADDITION: We Are Opened *DAYS *EVENINGS *WEEKENDS **SAME DAY APPTS**
***We Now are Exclusively Providing our Services through Online Teletherapy. All of our Clients Love it and We Feel it is even More Effective and Intimate than in-person, Not to Mention, the Problems with the Winter and Virus/Colds etc. Telehealth allows us to be Opened Seven Days a Week, Evenings & Weekends. You can use your Computer or Your Phone to Log on through the link we send to your Email.
***Our Philosophy is Simple: YOU ARE NOT ALONE !!
Dr. Mitch PsyD (Doctorate Degree PsyD from Southern California University, MSW from Tulane University and a BA. in Psychology from Lehman/Hunter College) and Lisa Couples/Relationship Life Coach & Marriage Mediator (Lehman/Hunter College) have worked as a Psychotherapist for over 35+ Years, Co-Leading all of our Private Workshop (presently both of us are working as Life Coaches.). Couples/Marriage Workshops & Alcohol/Addictions are our Specialty & we offer a Male/Female Perspective/Perceptions of your Problems. Men and Women are wired differently. "Men are from Mars and Women from Venus".
**We Specialize in Private Couples/Marriages/Families/Pre-Marital Workshops & Private Alcohol/Addictions Workshops. We Both Co-Lead our Workshops, in order to have a Male & Female Perspective. Our Clients Love the Fact, that all four of us will sit down together and Identify your Real Problems, from both a Male and Female Perspective.
**We really are Caring People/Professionals who will be Sensitive to the Both of You (We Do Not Take Sides but you can always Count on our Honesty). We will Teach you and Demonstrate to you (right in the First Session) the Skills you need to Communicate Effectively. Therefore, Learn how to Resolve your Problems, Now and in the Future. In Addition, we will Help You Build Trust Back into your Loving Relationship. Teaching you the Art of Healing. Forgiveness, Empathy, Compassion & Sensitivity which will bring back Your Loving Relationship that you are both Wanting and Needing.
Services Provided
| Deeper Love & Intimacy | Low Self-Esteem-Self-Worth | Depression & Anxiety |
| Anxiety & Panic attacks | Marriage/Couples Workshops | Narcissism-Borderline-Bi-Polar |
| Gaslighting-Love Bombing | All Addictions | Substance Abuse |
| Grief - Death & Dying | Loss and Loneliness | Porn Addiction-Social Media |
| Suicidal Thoughts | Relationships/ Couples | Marriages-Pre-Marriages |
| Parenting & Co-Parenting | Family & Blended Family issues | Spousal Abuse |
| Communication Skills & Rules | Teenagers and Children | Trust & Infidelity & Honesty |
| Fears-Phobias-Anxiety | Obsessive Compulsive Disorder | Confidence & Personal Power |
| Seniors | Sex Addiction & Abuse | P.T.S.D. Trauma |
| Self -Esteem & Inner Peace | Gender Identity | Sexuality |
| LGBTQ Issues | Women's Issues | Anger & Control Management |
| Co-Dependency | Men's Issues | Finances |
| Alcohol Dependency | Assertiveness | Health & Medical |
| Eating Disorders | Spirituality | Philosophy |
*****INFIDELITY***
**ONE OF OUR BIGGEST REFERRALS TO OUR PRATICE IS INFIDELITY, DISHONESTY & LACK OF TRANSPARENCY: We have realized that some Emotional and Physical Affairs are in fact, INFATUATIONS & or LIMERENCE and therefore, limits the Person's Ability to Think and Reason Properly. It can make them Act Reckless and Out of Control. Therefore, we treat the Infatuation as an Addiction and Teach the ART OF DEEP LOVE
. *****In Addition, Reasons why people Cheat: Out of Anger, Desire to get Revenge, Needs that are not being met, Loneliness, Boredom, Feelings of being Neglected, Being Loved Bombed by the person who is Pursuing you, Sexual needs not being satisfied, or just the opportunity presents itself. All in all, there are many reasons why people Cheat, not just one. We will help our Couples Learn why this has happened & Help our Couples Heal & Find the Pathway to Forgiveness, in order to move forward and try to find the Silver-Lining. **Many of our Couples have overcome these Challenges & Now have a much better Relationship in so many ways.
1) Unconditional Love, the Selfless Act of Loving Someone with Full Acceptance and Without Expecting anything in Return.
2) We figure out what makes the other person Happy & You are Happy to do those things.
3) Commitment to Continue being Together & Caring about each other Indefinitely.
4) Willingness to go Deep & have some Vulnerable Conversations is a good sign of Growing Intimacy.
5) Your Relationship does not fall apart every time you Disagree, Nor are you working hard to avoid conflict because you do not want to fight.
6) Your Sex Life is always Evolving which can bring more Intimacy to your Relationship.
7) Respect for your Opinions, Feelings, Needs, Beliefs & Desires.
8) Shared Values, Ethics, Morals & Philosophy
9) Honesty, Trustworthiness & Transparency
10) Feelings of Safety, Equality & Affection
11) Creating an Environment where both people Feel Safe Being themselves & Sharing your Thoughts & Feelings which requires both of you to be Emotionally Available.
12) TRUST that you Will Not Reject Me, because if I Don't Feel Safe, I will not be able to Share my Deeper Self with you.
3 Signs That a Partner May Be a Serial Cheater
The "once a cheater, always a cheater" stereotype applies to these people.
KEY POINTS
- Serial cheaters often had a tumultuous past, and their infidelity can be traced back to unresolved issues.
- People with attachment anxiety may turn to infidelity to reduce the risk of experiencing abandonment.
- Individuals who are more impulsive are also more likely to have accepting attitudes toward infidelity.
The toll that infidelity can take on the foundation of a committed relationship cannot be understated. Serial cheaters, or individuals with a history of repetitive and compulsive infidelity, however, can introduce an additional layer of complexity to an already murky issue.
This is because serial cheating cannot be blamed on isolated lapses in judgment. Instead, it indicates a dangerous pattern of behavior that can have emotionally devastating consequences for multiple people involved, including the cheater.
While it is certainly not necessary to empathize with an individual who compulsively participates in such problematic behaviors, but trying to understand where their actions stem from can shed light on the deeper issues at play—introducing opportunities for forgiveness and maybe even reformation.
Conclusion
Cheating can trap you in a never-ending loop. If you or your partner find yourselves trapped in the cycle of infidelity, it is important that you remind yourselves of the possibility of change and healing. It begins with recognizing and taking responsibility for your behavior, driven by a genuine inner desire for change, rather than merely seeking to preserve a relationship. It’s a path that demands commitment to self-awareness, healing, and ongoing personal growth.
What Is Post Infidelity Stress Disorder
When you are in a relationship with someone who chooses to be unfaithful to you, it can cause lasting effects for many months or years to come. Even when a person wants to move forward, the road is often long and difficult. When infidelity crosses over into your mental health space, this can cause a lasting disorder called Post infidelity stress disorder or PISD.
Aside from the obvious, there are many other things that this disorder makes a person feel or do.
PISD disorder is similar to PTSD in many ways. While its effects only tend to last about a week to a few months, during this period, a person can experience flashbacks, similar to those experienced among people with PTSD. You may replay the sequence of events that led up to you finding out about your partner’s Infidelity. You could also relive moments when your partner stayed out late after work or took a mysterious phone call.
It is not uncommon that someone struggling with PISD will equate all mysterious activity to cheating. These assumptions can cause severe emotional blows to the person who is hurting, and the emotional wounds that result can belong-lasting and devastating.
****Trust Issues****
One of the primary and most apparent outcomes of PISD is trust issues.
Trust is arguably one of the most important aspects of a relationship. If you had everything else in a relationship except trust, what would you have? The emotional stress caused by not trusting your partner can make the relationship bland and devoid of meaning.
After a person has been cheated on, it can feel like their whole world came crumbling down on top of them. They may feel betrayed, and this can cause them to be hesitant to trust in the future. The pain and turmoil caused by infidelity are not mild and shouldn’t be treated as such.
The trust in themselves and others can be built back up, but the walls built will be high and difficult to get over.
If you or a person you love is struggling with PISD, remember that patience is the best thing you can practice when you are trying to conquer the disorder. Even though you may feel like the onset happened rather quickly, the healing process does take time.
***NEW TERMINOLOGY:
***Love Bombing:
Love Bombing is an attempt to influence a person by demonstrations of attention and affection. It can be used in different ways and for either positive or negative purposes. Psychologists have identified love bombing as a possible part of a cycle of abuse and have warned against it.
***Gaslighting:
Gaslighting is Psychological manipulation that makes the recipient question their feeling, instincts and even their sanity (Preys on your Insecurities & Fears). It is one of the worst forms of dirty fighting and it is used by both men and women. Gaslighting includes a variety of techniques, such as: *Pretending not to understand someone when you do *Labeling your partners thoughts as crazy or imagined *Questioning the other person's memory of events when they remember correctly *Pretending to forget what actually occurred when you actually remember *Denying promises that you know you made *Trivializing the other person's feelings as being too sensitive when their reaction is somewhat normal.
***Trauma Bonding:
Trauma Bonding are Emotional bonds with an individual that arise from a recurring cyclical pattern of abuse perpetuated by intermittent reinforcement through rewards and punishments. This process of forming trauma bonds is referred to as trauma bonding or traumatic bonding. This results when the abused person forms an unhealthy bond with the person that abuses them. The abused person may develop sympathy for the abusive person, which become reinforced by cycles of abuse, followed by remorse.
***Discernment Workshops:
When Ending the Relationship is on the Table (by one of you or both of you). This is a Short Term Decision making Process, lasting anywhere between 1-5 Sessions. Our Workshops Goals are to have Greater Clarity & Confidence regarding the Future of Your Marriage. This will be Based on a Deeper Understanding of what brought you to the point where Divorce is an Option. In Summary, Our Discernment Workshops Helps the Couple Determine Whether or Not they Should or Want to try to Save their Relationship. This Process Provides and Gives the Couple the Opportunity to be Heard, Understood and Talk about why they are Considering Leaving and Considering Staying.
***Best Friends:
***Most Important we believe Strongly that being Best Friends is the Key to Recovery of Your Deep and Loving Relationship. We therefore, Focus our Attention on being each others (BFF). We want you guys to be able to Support each other, be a Shoulder to cry on, help you through hard times, Celebrate your Achievements and Encourage you to be the Best you can Be. In Short, Someone that you can talk to about everything, and who makes you feel Comfortable without the Fear of Judgement.
***The Healing Process for Infidelity:
This Process is Three Fold: 1) Taking Responsibility of One's Actions & Learning about why this happened, without Blaming the Relationship. 2) Being Sensitive, Compassionate, Empathic & Remorseful to Whom the Person who this Trauma was Committed on 3) Helping the Person Heal in Time & Learn the Art of Forgiveness. Its Almost the same as POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER: A Disorder in which a Person has Difficulty Recovering after Experiencing or Witnessing a Terrifying Event. This PTSD has Recurring Triggers which can last a very long time and which can bring back Memories of the Trauma accompanied by Intense Emotional and Physical Reactions. Feelings include Intense Anger, Hurt & Pain, Helplessness & Powerlessness, Shock, Despair & Hopelessness, Suicidal Ideation, Feelings that Lower our Self-Esteem & Confidence and More...
***** NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER (NPD)
**Some of the Characteristics (at least 5) Include: *Overinflated sense of self-importance *Constant thoughts about being more successful, powerful, smart, loved or attractive than others. *Feelings of Superiority and desire to only associate with high-status people *Need for excessive admiration* Sense of entitlement *Willingness to take advantage of others to achieve goals *Lack of understanding and consideration for other people's feelings and needs *Arrogant or snobby behaviors and attitudes. However, we have been successful in teaching these people Sensitivity, Compassion and Empathy in order to be able to relate to your Feelings & Feel Your Feelings, which can lead to Positive Changes. Have Hope (which is Greater than Fear). ***In Addition, Covert Narcissism is the introverted side of NPD. These people experience the same insecurities as an Overt Narcissist, but internalizes their self-importance, often while hyper-focusing on their Need for Attention. They come across as Introverted, Self-Conscious and Insecure.
***COMMUNICATION BREAKDOWN**MARRIAGE RULES & SKILLS
*****Remember, their are many Challenges, Problems & Issues that all Couples have, but its the Communication Process that Stays Constant Throughout ones Relationship, therefore, the Communication Process Must be Working Effectively. With a Communication Breakdown, Couples Will Not be able to Resolve their Problems Successfully.
**Marriage Rules & Skills are Located above on the left hand side**
*** In Addition, we Specialize in *Control and Anger Issues* TRUST & LYING* Co-Dependency Issues* Infidelity Issues* Sex & Intimacy *Alcohol & Substance Abuse, Parenting Issues & Blending Families together, Emotional Abuse, Pre-Marital Workshops, Bi-Polar, (BPD) Borderline Personality Disorder & Narcissistic Personalities & much more.
*** THE UNCONSCIOUS MIND***
Our Unconscious mind is present without our knowledge (operating under our Radar) in order to Protect us from Psychological Pain and therefore, can Sabotage our CLOSE and LOVING Relationships. We have to make the "Unconscious Mind" Conscious and the "Invisible" Visible (thru Mindfulness & Awareness) in order to understand our "Inner Child" which is our Unconscious Mind and how it Operates. The best way I can describe this Challenge of overcoming this Sabotage is through an example:
**If you have ever been in a Circus, you will remember the high Trapeze and the Men & Women Swinging Back & Forth, Trusting that they will be caught when they reach the other side. However, if they are Not Caught, they will Fall and Certainly Die. Now, the Trapeze Artist that are Swinging, Do Not Really Care that much if they are Dropped because even if they Do Fall, their is always a Safety Net to catch them. Well, how many of these Artists would swing Back & Forth if the the Safety Net was taken away? Probably, None of them, because they would Certainly Die if there was just one mistake and they Fell to the Ground. Well, that's the way our Unconscious Minds try to Protect You from getting Hurt & Devastated. In Essence, Deep Love means Loving without the Safety Net. Deep Love means Vulnerability, not being in Control, which in turn creates much Fear & Anxiety of getting Blind -Sided and Hurt/Devastated. Most of us have been Hurt/Devastated many times in our Lives and therefore, our Unconscious Mind Does Not Want to ever be Hurt again. Our Unconscious Mind Must Stop your Close and Loving Relationship by Sabotaging your Love by Creating Space, Distance and Conflict. The Unconscious mind changes your Trust and Deep Love for each other and the result is that we pull back and put our (Guard Up High) and start to Mistrust and Mistreat our Loved ones. If left unchecked this Unconscious Dynamic Sabotages our Loving Relationship by Creating Conflict & Distance.
***In Summary, we Both Must Make our "Unconscious" Mind "Conscious", the "Invisible" "Visible" and Practice Mindfulness and Awareness, so we can Control and Stop the Sabotage that is Destroying our Loving Relationship and our Happiness. We Must overcome our Fears & Anxieties by Learning to be Strong, through Developing a High Self-Esteem.. Self-Image, Self-Worth & Self Confidence.
** OUR ALCOHOL & ADDICTIONS WORKSHOPS:
OUR INTENSIVE OUTPATIENT TREATMENT HAS BEEN DESIGNED TO KEEP YOU OUT OF THE HOSPITAL/INPATIENT & INSTEAD KEEP YOU WITH YOUR FAMILY WHILE CONTINUING TO WORK ON YOUR JOB. **See Above on the left hand side.
***RELTIONSHIPS IN CRISIS***RAPID RECOVERY ACCELERATION**
***OUR PRIVATE COPLES WORKSHOPS: Designed to be Longer than Traditional Couples Sessions, Designed to be more Educational & Informational (Learning Skills to Communicate on a Deeper Loving Level), Concentrate on our Couples Challenges, Stay in the Present as opposed to Digging up all your Past, Give you a Male & Female Perspective of your overall Issues & Challenges, Teach Sensitivity-Compassion-Empathy, Heal our Couples Pain, in order to Create a Deeper Love between the Two of You & Develop a Pathway for Forgiveness.
***Our Workshop Program Consists of ***
1) Having Two Individual Sessions to Learn about your History & Both of your Perspectives of your Relationship. 2) Teach & Discuss the Communication Skills and Rules, Teach you & Identify the Dynamics that are affecting your Relationship, Teach you the Art of Sensitivity & Compassion. 3) Demonstrate how to be Connected (on an Emotional Level) with each other as a Team and Not be Adversarial with one another. 4) Resolving your Present Problems through the New Communication Process and Showing you the Pathway to Developing a Deeper Love. 5) In Addition, Dealing with Specific Problems that are Affecting your Relationship *Alcohol & Drugs *Infidelity *Lying & Lack of Transparency *Parenting & Blended Families *Co-dependency *Control & Emotional/Physical Abuse *Addictions of all Types *Mental Illnesses *Anger Issues *Narcissism *Bi-Polar Disorders and so much more.
***OUR PRIVATE ACCELERATED COMPREHENSIVE PROGRAM***
***ESPECIALLY, for Couples that have Been through Traditional Counseling & was Greatly Disappointed***
*****OUR PROGAM STARTS with TWO INDIVIDUAL SESSIONS****
***THEN APROXIATELY 3 to 5 WEEKS****
***RELATIONSHIPS in CRISIS WORKSHOP***
***VIP RAPID RECOVERY PROGRAM***
****PRIVATE COMPREHENSIVE WORKSHOPS: Dr. Mitch PsyD &/or Lisa Life Coach (Co-Leading for over 35 years)
***PROGRAM FEES:
***INTAKE SESSION: $225
***TRADITIONAL INDIVIDUAL or COUPLES SESSION: $275 (45 MINUTES) (DR. MITCH)
***ADVANCED INDIVIDUAL or COUPLES WORKSHOP: $395 (45 MINUTES) (DR. MITCH &/or LISA) $495 (60 MINUTES) $595 (75 MINUTES) $650 (90 MINUTES)
***Sliding Fee Scale***
****CANCELLATION POLICY*****
We do have our Cancellation Policy (pay the price for the session), for not Canceling within 48 hours of your appointment time. Thank you for understanding, as we have many clients that we have to turn away, due to our busy practice.
*****LIFE LONG LEARNING******
Fundamentals of Lifelong Learning** Learning to Know, Learning to Do, Learning to Live Together and Learning to Be. Lifelong Learning is about Developing your Full Potential, Skill Development and Growth via Self-Actualization.
*****AFTERCARE/LIFE COACHING*** This Program is Designed to follow you through your Life Journey. We stay with you even after you Graduate from our Program. We will Continue to Guide you for as long as you want us to, by coming back to us every so often for a TUNE-UP.
***All Our Telehealth Sessions Are Confidential & Always HIPAA COMPLIANT***
**Since Couples/Marriage Workshops are not covered by Insurance, therefore, you Do Not have to deal with Authorizations or Referrals & Never have to deal with an Annual Max. from your Insurance Company. We Do Accept your HSA (Health Savings Plan).
5 Principles of Effective Couples Workshops
Make your Relationship work by following these five basic principles.
***KEY POINTS
- When properly conducted, Couples Workshops can have demonstrably positive effects.
- Principles of effective Couples Workshops include modifying dysfunctional behavior, decreasing emotional avoidance, and improving communication.
- By remembering that each Relationship has its unique challenges and strengths, you'll be giving yours the best chances for survival.
******Five Basic Principles of Effective Couples Workshops:
1. Changes the views of the Relationship.
Throughout our process, we attempt to help both Partners see the relationship in a more objective manner. They learn to stop the "blame game" and instead look at what happens to them in a process involving each partner. They also can benefit from seeing that their Relationship takes place in a certain context. For example, couples who struggle financially will be under different kinds of situational stresses than those who do not. We will begin this process by collecting "data" on the interaction between the partners by watching how they interact. We then formulate "hypotheses" about what factors may lead to the way the partners interact. There's empirical support for a variety of approaches, from behavioral to insight-oriented. We will use different strategies, in order to focus on altering the way the relationship is understood then the couple can start to see each other, and their interactions, in more adaptive ways.
2. Modifies dysfunctional behavior.
We attempt to change the way that the partners actually behave with each other. This means that in addition to helping them improve their interactions, we also need to ensure that our clients are not engaging in actions that can cause physical, psychological, or economic harm. In order to do this, we must conduct a careful assessment to determine whether our clients are, in fact, at risk. If necessary, we may recommend, for example, that one partner be referred to a domestic violence shelter, to specialized drug abuse treatment, or to anger management. It is also possible that if the risk is not sufficiently severe, the couple can benefit from "time-out" procedures to stop the escalation of conflict.
3. Decreases emotional avoidance.
Couples who avoid expressing their private feelings put themselves at greater risk of becoming emotionally distant and growing apart. We help our clients bring out the emotions and thoughts that they fear expressing to the other person. Attachment-based couples therapy allows the partners to feel less afraid of expressing their needs for closeness. According to this view, some partners who failed to develop "secure" emotional attachments in childhood have unmet needs that they carry over into their adult Relationships. They fear showing their partners how much they need them because they are afraid that their partners will reject them. Behaviorally based therapists assume that adults may fear expressing their true feelings because, in the past, they did not receive "reinforcement." Either way, both theoretical approaches advocate helping their clients express their true feelings in a way that will eventually draw them closer together.
4. Improves Communication.
Being able to Communicate is one of the "three C's" of intimacy. All effective Couples Workshops focus on helping the partners to Communicate more effectively. Building on principles #2 and #3, this Communication should not be abusive, nor should partners ridicule each other when they do express their true feelings. Couples may, therefore, require "coaching" to learn how to speak to each other in more supportive and understanding ways. We may also provide the Couple with didactic instruction to give them the basis for knowing what types of Communication are effective and what types will only cause more conflict. They can learn how to listen more actively and empathically, for example. Couples with a long history of mutual criticism may require a different approach than those who try to avoid conflict at all costs.
5. Promotes Strengths.
We point out the strengths in the Relationship and build resilience particularly as Workshop nears a close. Because so much of Couples Workshops involves focusing on problem areas, it's easy to lose sight of the other areas in which Couples function effectively. The point of promoting strength is to help the Couple derive more enjoyment out of their Relationship. We may "prescribe" that one partner do something that pleases the other.
We can see, then, that people in Troubled Relationships need not give up in despair if their situation seems bleak. By the same token, people afraid of entering long-term relationships can be encouraged by learning that Trouble Relationships can be fixed.
Looking at the flip side, these five principles of effective Workshops suggest ways that Couples can build and maintain positive Close Relationships. Take an objective look at your Relationship, to get help to reduce dysfunctional behaviors, feel that you can share your emotions, communicate effectively, and emphasize what's working. Most importantly, by remembering that each Relationship has its unique challenges and strengths, you'll be giving yours the best chances for survival.
MARRIAGE/COUPLES CRISIS:
We have several Intense Private Couples/Marital Workshops that are Designed Especially for the RELATIONSHIPS that are going through a CRISIS PRESENTLY or want to make Good RELATIONSHIPS Better. These Couples NEED Extra Attention Right Away and Should Not have to Wait for the Traditional 1x per week Sessions. Please Call Dr. Mitch PsyD & Lisa to go over our different programs we offer. Dr. Mitch & Lisa will Try and Help you Save Your Marriage/Relationship Immediately.